Friday, February 27, 2015
Saturday, February 14, 2015
In honor of Valentine's Day we've decided to release the extended trailer for Dumped for all you heartbroken people out there. Dumped will be hitting the film festival and convention circuit throughout 2015.
Friday, February 13, 2015
Friday, February 6, 2015
Friday, January 30, 2015
Friday, January 23, 2015
Graduate school. I guess if I’m talking about Breakin’ Hundred I should start with date they were formed or the date they broke up but I honestly don’t remember. What I do remember is that they formed at some point toward my last years as an undergraduate and split-up at the end of my graduate school career. I asked the 4 former band members for specifics and got 5 different answers. (Philly answered twice; once under the name Philly, once under the name Michael). So, when I hear Breakin’ Hundred, I think back to graduate school.
|Dear college, I never truly appreciated how fun you were.|
I discovered the band through Krista Ryan. She introduced me to her then boyfriend Judd Jaworowski who was the bassist. He gave me their CD A Jar of Change for free and told me to check out one of their shows. Krista then proceeded to remind me of every single upcoming performance.
Not too long after I got the CD, a friend and I were sitting in his car listening to the album, breaking down each song one by one. We analyzed the CD, not as an amateur album made by a garage band, but a professionally produced piece of pop-art. We discussed everything from chord progression, to lyrics, to overall sound mixing. We talked about what worked, what didn’t, and how they could improve. We didn’t do this to be dicks, we believed they had genuine potential to get signed to a record label and just needed to smooth out some rough edges.
While Breakin’Hundred was trying to hit it big, I was trying to get my masters in Speech Communication, Performance, & Rhetorical Studies. Yes, the degree is as boring as the course work. A fulltime graduate student takes 3 classes (9 credits). Each class assignment typically involved reading 50-100 page essays written by old dead dudes blabbing about the fundamentals of communication, speech, pop-culture, performance and oration. We then needed the ability to give a thorough analysis of the material by the following week. To put this in context, here is a quote from Matthew Arnold’s Culture and Anarchy.
- “The disparagers of culture make its motive curiosity; sometimes, indeed, they make its motive mere exclusiveness and vanity. The culture which is supposed to plume itself on a smattering of Greek and Latin is a culture which is begotten by nothing so intellectual as curiosity; it is valued either out of sheer vanity and ignorance, or else as an engine of social and class distinction, separating its holder, like a badge or title, from other people who have not got it” (Matthew Arnold, Culture and Anarchy).
That’s just the first 2 sentences of a 49-page book that needed to be read in one week. It was also typical of the type of readings we were assigned. If I ever get ahold of a flux capacitor the concept of Sweetness and Light is going to mean time traveling psycho killer. Each class left me feeling like Lane Myer from Better Off Dead. During finals it was regularly expected that we write 20 page term papers all due the same week. That’s 60-80 pages of writing that analyzed dudes like Matthew Arnold, Jacques Derrida, and Plato (yes, Plato, congratulations you’ve heard of one of the old dead dudes I studied).
This sums up my life rather perfectly.
But once a month I’d hit up a Long Island bar and check out this band called Breakin’ Hundred. For about an hour out of my life I could forget about all those damn philosophers and books I wasn’t reading. I could ignore the papers I wasn’t completing and just listen to some indie pop rock. So when I think about Breakin’ Hundred I think about a time in my life where I needed the biggest distraction possible and they were happy to help.
The band went their separate ways right around the time when my academic career concluded. I always wished that I could have seen at least one show without Michel Foucault ringing in my subconscious but it wasn’t meant to be. It was a loss, not only from the music but also the collapse of the community that had formed around Breakin’ Hundred over the years.
One of my first graduate papers discussed the community that formed through music and Breakin’ Hundred was a band that proved my theory’s authenticity. I even cited their website’s message boards in the paper. What was also unfortunate was they never advertised their last show. They went from playing gigs twice a month to just being gone. Friends I saw rather frequently were gone overnight. Sure, I could attempt to hangout with them apart from a show but that’s just too much work.
So on January 16, 2015 Breakin’ Hundred reunited to say goodbye to Eric “Little Philly” Lao (the guitarist Philly’s brother) and their old drummer Mark Corso. Little Philly is moving away to some foreign country somewhere (Cuba maybe?) and Mark is retiring down south to Shady Pines. It was bittersweet because it wasn’t only a Breakin’ Hundred reunion, it was also a community reunion. I saw people I never thought I’d ever see again in my lifetime or the next. It seemed like they hadn’t changed much or maybe they were caught up in the nostalgia.
It was the best Breakin’ Hundred show I ever saw. Eric Maestre’s vocals were sharp, Judd looked relaxed and happy, Philly lifted his head up and talked to the crowd, and Mark made a joke. It was like all those rough edges were smoothed out, the band had personality, style, and solid music. I spent my time taping the show for the community members that couldn’t make it and for a moment forgot all about my mortgage, career, and overall adult responsibilities. So if you’re a fan, when you watch this video try to think about where you were in your life when they were going strong, then focus on the positive vibes they hopefully gave you. If you never heard them before, enjoy the distraction.
“I Like To Play With Toys” Productions®
Life After Breakin’ Hundred
Judd Jaworowski – Defeated the Evil Clan. His land was revived in peace and people will talk of his deeds as legend in years to come
Michael “Philly” Lao – In addition to finding the legendary 5 treasures, stunned the world with his discovery of 2 lost treasures. He became a master treasure hunter.
Mark Corso – Destroyed the vile Red Falcon and saved the universe. He considers himself a hero.
Eric Maestre – Completed his quest and was presented with a new quest by pressing Button B.
Friday, January 16, 2015
|The man who made the concept possible.|
The impeccably accurate Wikipedia defines Subliminal Messages as “any sensory stimuli below an individual's threshold for conscious perception.” So basically people are getting brainwashed without realizing it, much like in the awesome John Carpenter film They Live. The problem with the idea of Subliminal Messages is that it’s total crap. If it’s truly subliminal no one would ever know a person is being influenced.
|The sad thing is he would have won the election anyway.|
Let’s look at all those wonderful Disney controversies throughout the years. Let's start with the naked lady in the Rescuers. VHS playback allowed people to see a photo of a naked woman in the background while mouse versions Bob Newhart and Zsa Zsa Gabor flew away on the back of Dom Delouise to rescue some ugly ginger child from an alligator. The parents were up in arms. Disney was using a subliminal message to brainwash the animated viewing populous everywhere into being naked or not closing their curtains or something. The intended message that everyone inferred from the fraternity level prank is left to interpretation. That’s really the point.
|How many movies were watched in slow motion before the angry mom found something to gripe about.|
So in reality most people didn’t even see the encoded image in the backdrop until some overbearing mother decided to examine how G the MPAA rating of a movie really is. Therefore if a person doesn’t receive the encoding their brain can never decode it and thus understand what they are suppose to do.
I know what you’re all
thinking. "What about that episode of
Saved By the Bell when Zack used a Bo Revere song to trick Kelly into asking
him to the Sadie Hawkins Day Dance?" Well
despite the glaring fact that Screech was the true genius behind actually
implementing that plan, wouldn’t every politician in the world have hidden
audio in their campaign commercials to help them date rape women and tell
people to vote for them? This technology
would make every state in the union a swing state and completely screw up the
ever efficient Electoral College.
|Not this G|
|What could have been accomplished if they channeled their powers for good. Maybe Dustin Diamond would still have a career in entertainment.|
It’s not possible to secretly trick or influence the human mind. You can bother, threaten, beg, plead, love, guilt, kill with kindness, or outright lie to someone into getting them to do things that you want. All these actions require a person to be a willing participant in the message. You can’t just snap you fingers or plug the word “sex” into animated clouds and suddenly make the populous turn into nymphomaniacs. A neurosis like that takes years of familial and societal abuse.So the next time you eat an entire bag of Double Stuff Oreos and lapse into a diabetic coma don’t blame Nabisco for their advertising campaign, or when you contract that inevitable STD from frolicking with strange women you meet on the beach don’t blame Disney for the uncontrolled boners you get on wedding cruises. Blame yourself for being too smart for your own good.
|He was raised by a meercat and a pig.|
“I Like To Play With Toys” Productions®